It's Time to Recognize Dad

Work-Life balance isn’t just something moms manage. It’s a family thing. Moms and dads put in just that, the work, to provide for their families financially, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and mentally. And that in itself can be a full-time job. But there still seems to be this stigma that fathers put in more time at work, while mothers put in more time at home, regardless of whether they work. In actuality, the roles are more balanced or completely flip-flopped from that “traditional” mindset of society.

But why isn’t the role of working dad discussed or acknowledged as much as working mom?

As a working mom, I intimately know my role, day-to-day, and challenges, but no matter how much open dialogue I have with my husband, I could never fully understand his role as working dad. Not because I’m unwilling to, but because I haven’t personally experienced it.

Think of how much the working mom role is studied clinically from a postpartum standpoint and psychologically from a societal perspective. Could the same be said for working dads?

Now, we have made some progress in this arena because the discussion surrounding working dads is more relevant than it was even 5 years ago, but you don’t see a Netflix series called Working Dads. However, there is one called Workin’ Moms (which is certainly worth the watch, btw).

As a parent, think about your experience following childbirth, adoption, or any process in which you brought a tiny, new addition into your family. How many moms do you think experience postpartum depression or anxiety? What about dads? How many dads do you think experience postpartum depression or anxiety?

Here are the stats:

·         1 in 7 moms experiences postpartum depression

·         1 in 10 dads experiences postpartum depression

That means 10% of dads feel helpless and anxious after having a child. Maybe you are more attuned to the realness of these numbers than me, but I was very surprised at how many dads went through this. Being blessed enough to get pregnant and give birth to both of our sons, I looked at postpartum depression as a mom thing because of the hormonal, bodily changes that happened through pregnancy, labor and delivery, and then postpartum.

I also don’t remember my husband having to fill out any postpartum screening in those first couple of months after we had our boys. But again, it’s not a mom thing. It’s a family (parent) thing. Mental health impacts so much, especially the well-being of our children, so it’s time to marry the terms mom and dad into just parent. Working parent, stay-at-home parent, parent battling postpartum depression.

The stakes are too high not to, and the men in our lives deserve the support that’s needed in any (and every) facet of life and parenting. So, here's to every type of dad out there: we have your back and are in this together. Happy Father's Day!